One girl and one boy is just not enough.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
