i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
