I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
