Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
