So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Randomize
