I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
You were trust falling into bushes
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
