Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Randomize
