Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
