are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Found your dick twin last night
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
