Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
