There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
