you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
