just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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