Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
