Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
either way he was missing a nipple.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize