I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
