We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
