I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
