**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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