I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize