Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
