He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
