You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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