It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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