he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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