bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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