Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
