So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
