there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I need water and some morals
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
