im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
