She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Randomize
