i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
