I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
