So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I pour the whiskey from now on
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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