they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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