the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
