Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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