they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
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