i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
