yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
