Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
