he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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