how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
