I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
