What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
All the doctor said was why
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
