How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
