Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
