ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
