i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
