I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
